Thursday, 1 May 2008

A serious campaign for the mandatory wearing of odd socks

All of this campaign talk has got me in a bit of a tizz. I've watched the news reports, I've read the articles, and I've even taken the online test to see for whom I should be voting. And, after finally deciding whose box to check, I got to thinking about something very important that our fellow politicians seems to have forgotten about.

Oh sure, you can talk about your policies for crime, congestion charges, bendy buses, council tax, blah blah blah until you are blue in the face. But what about the issues that people really care about? What about quality of life? What about fun?

So, I give you a policy as amusing as some of the candidates themselves...

*Drum roll*

A CAMPAIGN FOR ODD SOCKS! At least once a week every person is required to openly wear odd socks.

OK, I can sense I am losing you, but please stay with me a little while longer as I explain. Think of it like this, not only do odd socks look kinda cool, but also when you wear them you feel cheeky, happy and sociable. And, they improve your efficiency. How so, you ask? Well, think of the amount of time you save by not having to:
a. Pair socks out of the washing machine. Or
b. Try to locate matching socks out of your underwear drawer.

Scientists have actually calculated that over a lifetime you can save 1000 hours of time by wearing odd socks. Errrr, that was a lie, but I sincerely reckon that if they did do such a calculation the figure would be in the vicinity of what I just quoted.

And so there you have it; a vote for odd socks is a vote for a friendlier, happier, more integrated and efficient society. Make it your personal political policy from now on.


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